Saturday, August 20, 2011

Little Fish Big Fish

My son is not even 1 year and already Mr. T and I are staying up late contemplating schools. Do we move to a small "city" and put him in those schools? Let him succeed as a big fish in a small pond? I have this crazy fear that, if he were to stay in this town, he would be spoiled by the attention and familiarity and never want to leave.

In this town you need to be connected to get along, but my own instinct is to buck popularity and thumb my nose at the elite. Yet, I rub elbows with them and attend their parties. Some are scummy and some are sweet. I guess my challenge is not to sell out to the scum. Keep my integrity while furthering the advancement of Baby T. Maybe he gets a better opportunity.


I would rather we move to the bigger city where there is a mix of different cultures, art museums, festivals, the college campus, theatres, multiple parks, and (gasp) sidewalks! I want to be where life is not stagnant! I want my boy to be more like me! Is that selfish? Not at all. I love who I am and the decisions I have made. I want my boy to be adventurous! I want my boy to know that it's okay to leave home and explore the world! Big pond, little fish.


I know I can instill that sense of adventure and daring regardless of where we live. I remind myself that big pond or little pond, my boy is a Koi, a most resilient fish. He will adjust to any environment I put him in.

P.S. If you have PJ Harvey singing in your head, your welcome. ;)

1 comment:

  1. I want you to know... I admire you SO MUCH because you are indeed YOU. I am envious sometimes of the experiences you have had that shaped you into you, but then I know if I hadn't had my own experiences- I wouldn't be me... and then I wouldn't have you for my aweso. <3